Nick and Alvin Author: JanetD Email: jdillon@mail.win.org Rating: PG (language) Summary: Alvin and a reluctant Nick go to dinner after Alvin becomes Nick’s sponsor. Author's Notes: This story begins on the Friday before the Monday that Nick makes his address in the 12-step meeting shown at the beginning of “The Divide”. At the time I wrote this story I assumed that Nick was attending a Narcotics Anonymous (NA) meeting, and that, therefore, Alvin had a (past) problem with drugs, not alcohol (as we later learned). I went a bit wild with Alvin’s background in this one, so bear with me. =) Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. The characters in this story are borrowed from the TV show "The Guardian". No money is being made from this story. Any resemblance of a character in this story to any real person living or dead is purely coincidental. Likewise, any resemblance between an organization depicted in this story and any such actual organization is purely coincidental. March 2002 Setup: Alvin is at work at his desk at LSoP on a Friday afternoon. Barbara buzzes him to let him know there is a Phil Monroe on line 2. Alvin picked up the phone, and said, “This is Alvin Masterson.” “Mr. Masterson, I don’t know if you’ll remember me. My name is Phil Monroe. We met at a NA sponsor’s workshop at couple years back.” Alvin thought for a second, and then said, “Mr. Monroe! Yes, yes, I remember you. What can I do for you?” “Call me Phil.” “Okay, sure.” “Well, we have a, a mutual acquaintance that I believe is in some trouble, and I think he could use your help.” “A mutual acquaintance? Who is it?” “Nick Fallin.” “Nick?” Alvin said, with surprise. What kind of trouble is he in?” “Well, I’ll get to that. First, let me tell you that I’ve been his sponsor at NA since he started the program about eight months ago. It’s been a challenge, to put it mildly.” Alvin nodded sympathetically. “He’s been a real tough nut to crack. I just don’t feel he’s made any progress in dealing with his problem. Then something happened a couple months back that has me concerned.” “What?” asked Alvin. “Well, I’d rather not discuss that on the phone. Let’s just say he had something of a crisis. Anyway, if you have the time, I would really like to get together with you over lunch, and talk about Nick. Would you be free sometime this weekend?” “Sure. How’s tomorrow? 12:30 at McIntire’s on Jefferson? Do you know where that is?” “Yeah. All right, I’ll see you then. And thank you.” “Sure. Bye.” “Goodbye.” Alvin stared out the window for a moment wondering what had happened two months ago that had Phil Monroe concerned about Nick Fallin. ---+--- Setup: McIntire’s restaurant. Phil is seated, and sees Alvin walk in. He waves him over to the table. “Phil,” Alvin said, extending his hand. It’s good to see you again.” Phil shook Alvin’s hand, as he replied, “Nice to see you too, Alvin. Please...sit.” Alvin took off his jacket and sat across from Phil. The waitress walked up and took the men’s drink order. They make a little casual conversation while looking at the menu. The waitress returned with their drinks, and took their orders for lunch. “So,” Alvin said. “You wanted to talk about Nick?” “Yes. As I told you on the phone, I’ve had no luck getting anywhere with him. He’s treating the whole program as just something he has to do to fulfill the conditions of his probation. He’s not come to terms with the fact he has a problem. He’s been at every meeting--I can’t fault him there--but I can tell he views the experience as a complete waste of his time. You won’t believe how often I’ve caught him checking his watch during meetings. “I hear ya, there,” Alvin interjected, with a nod of his head. “I just think I’m not the right person to reach him. I think he needs a new sponsor. Someone he has more in common with.” Phil paused, and directed a significant look at Alvin. As Alvin realized what Phil was suggesting, his expression changed to one of stunned amazement. “Me? You want me to be Nick’s sponsor?” “Yes.” Alvin took a couple moments to consider this before he replied. “You think I could help him?” “I do,” Phil said sincerely. “He’s spoken a little about you. I know he respects you. And you have a leg up, already knowing him as you do.” Alvin chuckled mildly. “Well, yes, I know him, but I wouldn’t say I know him well. I doubt many people could say that. Mr. Fallin doesn’t seem to let many people through that hard shell of his.” Phil nodded his understanding. “Do you think he would go for the idea?” Alvin asked. “I don’t know. But, I think it would be worth a shot. He’s just marking time the way it is now, and I’m afraid it’s going to catch up with him again.” “Again?... You mentioned a crisis on the phone yesterday. That was it?” “Un-huh. Look before I go into that, I’d like to know if you’re open to the idea of becoming his sponsor. What do you say?” Alvin looked thoughtful. “All right. I’m willing to give it a try...if he is.” Phil smiled. “That’s great. I really think you may be able to do him some good.... Great.... Now, let’s see, to pick up where I left off. Yes. I recently got Nick to admit that he’d used coke a couple months ago. He says it hasn’t happened again since then, and I believe him. But I’m afraid if he doesn’t start to accept his own addiction...accept that it’s a reality of his life...he may back-slide again.” Alvin nodded. Phil continued. “Nick’s never stood before the group before. I’ve convinced him to do it this Monday. I’d like you to be there to hear what he has to say. Then after, we can talk to him together. See what he thinks about the idea.” Alvin looked thoughtful. “All right. What time is the meeting, and where is it?” “It’s at 12:30 at the Langley Center.” Alvin nodded. “Okay, I’ll be there.” Phil nodded in turn. After a moment, Phil asked Alvin about some of his other experiences as a sponsor, and the men began to share recollections of this part of their lives. ---+--- Setup: It’s the Monday after Nick has agreed to accept Alvin as his sponsor. Nick is in talking to Alvin about an LSoP case. As he’s about to leave, Alvin calls him back. “Oh, Nick,” said Alvin. Nick stopped, and turned back to look at Alvin. “Yes?” “I thought we could have dinner tomorrow night. What do you say?” Nick started to refuse, but Alvin gave him a ‘look’. “O-Okay,” Nick finally conceded. “Good. How ‘bout 8:00 at Johnny Flynn’s? You know where that is, don’t you?” “Yeah. Fine. 8:00,” Nick replied, and walked out the door. ---+--- Setup: Johnny Flynn’s Restaurant. Nick walked in the door about five minutes after 8:00. As he entered, he saw Alvin waiting for him on a bench near the door. Alvin stood up, and said, “Nick.” Nick replied, “Alvin.” with slight wariness. Nick took off his overcoat, and hung it on the coat tree. He was still dressed in his normal business attire--Armani suit (black), crisp white shirt, and blue tie. Alvin was jacketless, and had his shirt collar open. Alvin led the way to the hostess stand. “Hi,” he said to the young woman behind the dais. “I’m Alvin Masterson. Johnny was reserving one of the back rooms for us.” The hostess consulted her list briefly, “Certainly, Mr. Masterson,” she said. “Right this way.” She led them through the crowded, noisy restaurant, and into a small room that contained just four tables. “Here you go,” she said pleasantly, showing them to their seats, and handing each a menu. “Your server will be here in just a moment. Enjoy your dinner.” With those words, she left them alone. There was a moment’s awkward silence, as the two men stared at each other. It was broken by Alvin, who opened up his menu, and said, “Well, let’s see....” After a few seconds, Nick turned his attention to the menu, as well. In an attempt to start some conversation, Alvin asked Nick if he had ever been to Johnny Flynn’s before, and when he learned he hadn’t, he offered some suggestions about what he might like to try. Nick listened politely, but made no comment. After several minutes, the waitress arrived, apologizing for the delay. She took their drink orders, and then asked if they knew what they wanted for dinner. Alvin said, “Well, I do. Nick?” Nick nodded. First Alvin, then Nick gave his order to the waitress, and she left, promising to return promptly with their drinks. Nick looked around the room, and started to drum his fingers on the table, but stopped himself when he became aware that Alvin had noted the nervous gesture. Nick sat up a little straighter. Alvin observed this too. Neither man said a word until after the waitress had returned with their drinks, and then departed. “So, Nick,” Alvin said. Nick looked up from studying his drink. “I think the first thing you should know is that I was at the meeting the other day when you addressed the group.” “Wha-what? You were there?” Nick said, obviously unsettled. “I never saw you. Where were you?” “I was late. I walked in right after you started speaking. Then you left so quickly afterwards there wasn’t time to, to let you know I’d been there.” Nick looked down at the table with a frown, and made little circles with one index finger in the moisture left behind by his ice water glass. He didn’t say anything. Alvin continued. “I heard what you said. About what happened a couple months ago.” Nick turned his head away, and compressed his lips together. Alvin went on. “I’d like you to tell me about that.” “Why?” Nick challenged, looking directly at Alvin. “It’s done with. It’s not going to happen again.” Alvin sighed. “How can you be sure of that, Nick?” Nick continued to look stubborn. “I’m sure, all right? I’ve got things under control again. I just slipped that’s all. It was just a slip.” Alvin shook his head ruefully. “We’ve all said that, Nick. All of us. But those slips have a way of repeating themselves.” He ran a hand through his hair. “Tell me what happened. Please...I’m asking as your sponsor.” Nick brought a hand up to his mouth, as his face took on a resigned look. He shifted in his seat, and cleared his throat. Finally, unable to look at Alvin, he began. “It, uh, it was in January. The week I started at Kirk & McGee.” He shot a side-long glance at Alvin who was listening impassively. “The first day I was there I ran into my-my old dealer in the hallway.” Alvin did show his surprise at this revelation. “He was there to visit one of the associates. But later, later he, uhm, he came into my office.” Nick ran a hand down the back of his head. “He, he did a line of coke right there, right in front of me, on my credenza.” Nick shifted uncomfortably again. “After he left, well, I went over to the credenza, and there was a little bit of powder left....” He stopped there. Alvin finished for him, “And you used it.” Nick nodded, looking pained, but unable to meet Alvin’s eyes. “So, what happened then?” Alvin asked. Nick hesitated, but then replied. “The next day I went to see Colin--that’s the dealer. I...I told him not to come by the office anymore, to leave this other guy...this associate...alone. But, he, uh, well...he could see that wasn’t the real reason I was there. When he realized that, he slipped me some coke.” “And?” prompted Alvin. “And I went home, and-and used it.” Nick concluded. Alvin could see the expression of self-loathing descend on Nick’s face. “I was...I was high...most of the rest of that week.” “But you stopped using again. How? What made you stop?” Nick ran a hand down his hair once more. He didn’t answer for a moment, but then said with difficulty. “I, I lost a client...a big client. I guess that’s when I realized things were out of control again.” He glanced at Alvin, and added, “And I, and I lost a client for Fallin & Associates too.” “What do you mean?” Alvin asked with interest. Nick sighed, and rested his hand in front of his mouth once more. He looked very uncomfortable. “It’s, it’s a long story, but it boils down to my representing a former F&A client in the sale of his multi-million dollar company to his son. The son was being represented by my-my father.” He paused. “I advised my client to include some negative covenants in the contract. My father advised his client not to accept. Things...well...things got a little out of hand. I kind of lost it, I guess. The net result was that the Sloanes dismissed both firms.” Nick stopped, and took a long drink of his water. “I see. And there were repercussions from that?” Nick nodded, and wiped at his mouth. “Yeah, you could say that.” He smiled in self-derision. “My father was pretty upset. He called me into his office, and accused me of using again.... I denied it, of course.” Now the smile had turned cynical. “And Bill McGee was pretty displeased, as well, which is putting it mildly.” “Uh-huh. What happened next?” Alvin asked. “What do you think?” Nick asked, his voice rising. “I was completely disgusted with myself, that’s what. The day after I blew the deal I told myself I wasn’t going to use anymore. So, I went over to the Incline to get drunk instead. You might remember that day”--the cynical smile was back--“It was your birthday.” “Really?” “Un-huh. And I got drunk. I got plastered.... Of course, maybe you don’t remember. You were three-sheets-to-the-wind yourself.” Nick stopped, and looked at Alvin speculatively before continuing. “After you and Lulu left, I, uhm, I got into a fight with a couple guys.” He ducked his head in embarrassment at this admission. “A fight? Why?” “Doesn’t--it doesn’t really matter why. Anyway, this one guy and I exchanged a couple blows, and then his buddy cold-cocked me. I-I-I went down, and these two bastards started kicking me. The next thing I know my father, my father, is rushing in the door, pulling these guys off me.” Nick paused shaking his head. Then he continued with a note of admiration in his voice. “He was really something, ya know? When one of the guys started giving him lip, he broke a beer bottle over the bar, and started threatening them both with it. They took off like a couple scared rabbits.” He paused in reflection. “What happened then?” Alvin prodded. “Then, well, then my dad got me up off the floor, and took me home with him. I, uh, I spent the night on the couch. In the morning...in the morning he told me he wanted me to come back to Fallin & Associates. And I accepted. That was it.” He reached for his water glass again. “I see. And you haven’t used since that time?” “No.” “Did you tell your father you’d been using?” Nick looked at Alvin with an “are you nuts?” expression, and said, “No-ooh.” Alvin just looked at him for a moment. “Don’t you think your dad has a right to know?” Nick expelled a long breath, and ran a hand down his face. “He already thinks I was using, okay? Why should I lay it all out in black and white? What difference would it make?” Alvin replied with quiet sincerity, “Trust me, it would make a difference. And the person it’s going to make the most difference to is not your father. It’s you.” Nick just looked away. “So,” Alvin continued, sitting up a little straighter, and fixing Nick with a searching look. “So...you left your dad’s firm, and that same week you’re using again. Ever think about what that might mean?” “What are you talking about?” Nick demanded defensively. Alvin replied mildly, “I’m just saying, it looks to me like there might be a connection. How...how do you and your dad get along?” Nick narrowed his eyes, and shook his head. “We’re not talking about my dad here, okay?” “Maybe we should be,” Alvin answered. Nick continued to shake his head, but he wasn’t looking at Alvin now. Finally, he looked back, and said emphatically, “I’m not going to discuss my father with you. All right? So, just, just drop it.” Alvin studied Nick for another moment, but then acquiesced. “Okay,” he said simply. The tension in Nick’s face eased at that statement, and he sat back a little in his chair. Alvin picked up his glass, and relaxed back into his chair, as well. In just a few minutes their food arrived. Nick had not felt like eating when he had arrived, had only ordered something so as not to communicate that fact to Alvin. Now, he was surprised to find he actually had an appetite. There was little conversation over their meals. Alvin made one or two attempts to talk about something benign, but Nick made only minimal responses. Finally, Alvin gave it up, and they ate in silence. After the waitress had removed their plates, Alvin caught Nick looking at him speculatively. “What?” Alvin said. “Nothing.” “Well, it was something. What?” Nick looked uncomfortable, but said quietly, “I, uh, I was just wondering why it is you’re eligible to be my sponsor. I mean...that means, you, you....” His voice trailed off. Alvin said, “Means I’ve had a drug problem myself. Is that what you’re trying to say?” “Well, yeah.” Alvin said starkly, “I was shooting up heroin when I was eleven years old, Nick. Does that surprise you?” Nick was startled, and, at first, looked at Alvin as if he must be kidding. “Really?” he asked at last. Alvin nodded. “Really.” “Wha-what? How?” Alvin recited the story in a matter-of-fact voice. “My mother was an addict. I was in and out of foster homes from the time I was seven. When I was eleven I started working as a ‘runner’ for one of the neighborhood dealers. Part of my compensation was delivered through the end of a hypodermic needle.” He laughed harshly. “When I was twelve I got busted. But, I was lucky. They got me off the drugs, and then, despite enormous odds, I got placed with this wonderful couple--Harold and Lois Whitney. They’d recently lost their twelve-yea- old son to leukemia, and were looking for something to fill that hole in their lives.... I turned out to be that ‘something’.” Alvin smiled fondly. “They were great people, and their home.... Having a real home, it was like nothing I’d ever known.” He shook his head at the memory, and let out a sigh. “I owe my life to the Whitneys, in more ways than one.“ He paused for a moment, in reflection. “Things changed for me after that. I started doing well in my studies. When I got out of high school the Whitneys put me through college. Out of their own pockets, you know?” Nick nodded. Alvin paused again, and rubbed a hand through his hair. “It was the summer after I’d graduated from college. I was looking forward to law school.” He stopped again, and looked at Nick. “You understand I’d been clean all this time?” Nick nodded. He’d been listening with rapt attention to Alvin’s recital. Alvin continued, “Well, that summer my, my mom died.” Nick’s face took on a new expression, but Alvin didn’t notice. “I hadn’t see her in years. The Whitneys had wanted to adopt me, but my mom would never agree to it. Well, when she died, I, I uh, didn’t handle it too well. I descended into a downward spiral that ended up with me back on the needle. I, I’m not proud of that period of my life. But when the Whitneys realized what was happening they came through for me again. They got me help, got me into a rehab program, got me counseling to deal with my issues about my mother. I got straightened out, and was able to start law school only one semester late.” Alvin paused, and looked at Nick. He said simply, “So, you see, Nick. It’s like they say. Everybody’s got a story. And that’s mine.” Nick just nodded. He was overwhelmed that the Alvin Masterson he knew had been the child he had just described. It was incredible. He looked at Alvin with new-found respect. He searched for the proper words, but couldn’t find them. Finally, he just said softly, “Wow.” Alvin broke into laughter at that. Nick was at first taken aback, but then joined in, as he realized the absurdity of that single word as commentary on the life Alvin had just described. The End.