In Your Care

Author: Lambertoise
 
Email: jmlsi@sympatico.ca

Rating:  PG

Summary: The kids are one of the most important aspects of The Guardian.

Context: I always want to know what will happen to them. The action starts in 
January 2004. Assume The letter was never sent. All the characters are taken 
from The Guardian.

Again, all my thanks to Sarah.
********************************************************************

LSP 

“Nick!”

Nick raised his eyes and saw Laurie Solt walking briskly to his office, looking 
a little worried.

“Hi, Laurie. What can I do for you?”

“Wendy. Wendy Newburg. There will be a hearing later today.”

“Why?”

“She wants an abortion and her parents don’t want her to…”

“What?”

“Yes, she is 3 months pregnant and…”

“Nobody told me. Where is she?”

“She is with a social worker, downtown. She escaped the psychiatry ward a few 
days ago. But the police found her last night.”

“I can’t believe…”

“You better believe it. You have to be in court at 2 o’clock.” 

It was 8 o’clock. LSP’s offices were still relatively quiet at this time, but 
Alvin and James were already in. Nick took the papers he has been working on for 
the last hour and left the office in a hurry. He had to stop by his firm’s 
office before going to a meeting with a difficult client who wanted to take over 
a local company. Then he had to wrap up some cases before going to the 
courthouse at 2 o’clock.

On his way, he couldn’t stop thinking about Wendy. When he had called the help 
line, the year before, he was convinced that it was the only thing to do. Now, 
he wasn’t sure anymore: the mother was back with her husband and Wendy was kept 
in a psychiatric war. The angry words Wendy threw him still resonated to his 
ears: "My Dad having sex with me was 10 times better than being 
institutionalized." And now, this. 

The court house

Ten minutes before the court hearing, Nick met Wendy at the door. 

“So, Mr. Fallin, always my Guardian angel! Too bad you’re not there when I 
really need you,” Wendy told him, with a smirk. 

“Come here,” Nick opened the door of a private room. “Is it really what you 
want?”

“What? The abortion? Of course.”

“Who is the father?”
“It could be a nurse, a patient or a visitor. Don’t look so shocked, Mr. Fallin, 
it’s nothing. Actually, they paid me a good price!”

Nick stared, obviously shocked. “How could it go so wrong?” he asked himself.

“You don’t believe me? What do you care, anyway? Are we done here?”

“No, wait a minute. You’re telling me this occurred while you were at the 
hospital?”

“Yes. I’m not the only one. Staff is rare and they watch over those who need 
more surveillance. Me? It was just bad luck I was brought there, wasn’t it, Mr. 
my lawyer? You can do that anywhere.” She paused, giving him a falsely seductive 
look. “Would you like to try? I wouldn’t mind.” she said, looking at him, eyes 
filled with… was it contempt? Hatred? 

Nick went out and got to the courtroom, followed by Wendy. Have I made the wrong 
decision? he thought.

Wendy’s parents were both there. Their lawyer told the judge that their 
religious beliefs forbade abortion. 

“And what are these religious beliefs that permitted you to sexually abuse your 
daughters, Mr. Newburg?” Nick asked, looking at his papers.

“Mr. Fallin,” the judge scolded.

“Today,” Nick continued, “we are not here to listen to Mr. and Mrs. Newberg’s 
religion; we are here to decide what’s best for Wendy. She wants an abortion. 
And she has that right. Furthermore, I also want to make clear that Wendy was 
sexually abused while under the care of the state and that she should be moved 
away.” 

“Are the police investigating the situation?” the judge asked, genuinely 
concerned about the situation. There were other children placed in the same 
ward, and nobody, neither the judge or the social services or the hospital, 
wanted the subject unresolved.

“Yes, they are,” Nick answered. 

In less than 15 minutes, the judge made her decision: Wendy would have her 
abortion in the state hospital, as soon as possible. Social services were 
ordered to find her a place quickly. In the mean time, she would stay at the 
hospital.

LSP

“It’s such a waste of time,” Nick told Laurie the day after the hearing.

 “What?” Laurie asked, meeting with him to plan for Wendy’s transfer.

“These.” Nick said showing all the files on his desk. “What good did we do to 
her?” he added, going back to Wendy.

 “Sometimes it works, sometimes, it doesn’t. But it’s not…”

“I’m a corporate lawyer, for God’s sake. I am not supposed to do this crap.” 
Nick said, angrily.

Laurie was looking at him, saying nothing, listening.

 “Don’t you think so?” Nick continued, “all these kids, they’ll be back next 
year, then their children will be knocking at this same door. We represent them 
but, what do we really accomplish?”

“What is the difference between what you do here and what you do at your firm,” 
Laurie asked him seriously. 
“Money. I make money.”

“Maybe, but does that make you happier?”

Angry, he took his things and, before leaving, said:

“You know it is useless, Laurie, but you won’t admit it … because it would be as 
saying your life is a failure.” With these words, he stormed out.

The following days, Nick thought about his conversation with Laurie. His insults 
were certainly uncalled for. He knew that he had wrongfully unleashed his 
frustration on her. And if someone’s life was a failure, it was certainly not 
hers… 

He really liked that woman. Leslie, a girl for whom he has been appointed foster 
parent until she died, was the first one to see the connection between Laurie 
and Nick. And she told Nick at the time, pleasing him unbelievably. It had been 
a long time since anybody said something good about him. And Laurie has 
understood how deeply hurt he was with Leslie’s death. Since that morning at the 
hospital, where she consoled him, Nick considered Laurie with affection. She was 
sensitive, understanding, and she seemed to like him despite his flaws. He had 
to make some amends. Nick owed that to her, he owed it to himself. 

Two days later in the courthouse

Nick was not very used to make amends. So, as soon as he saw Laurie, he went to 
her, not wanting to wait longer than necessary.

“Laurie…?”
“Yes, Nick?”
“May I talk to you?”

She nodded.

“Laurie…I… I shouldn’t have... ”

“Nick,” she said, patting his arm, “you don’t need to apologize”

“Oh yes, I do.”

“I understand how you feel. But I also understand that if you are angry, this is 
because these children are important to you, they’re not just numbers, not just 
cases. You care for them and you’d like to do more.”

“Don’t you?”

“Sure, I do, that’s my hope everyday I go to work,” Laurie explained with that 
tone which always had a soothing effect on Nick. “But we deal with real life 
here Nick, and nothing is simple.” She paused and looked at him in the eyes. 
“That’s the thing I like the most about you, you arrogant corporate lawyer,” she 
added with a smile, “you really care about these children and you always do your 
best for them.”

“But we fail them, Laurie.”

“We might fail them, too often probably, but we must keep trying, because if we 
don’t, these children will have nothing. Nobody and nothing.”

Wendy was walking to them escorted by a young social worker. 

“Nick, are you coming? It’s time for my hearing,” Wendy said dryly.

“Yes.” He turned to Laurie and asked: “Is it OK with the Allegheny County 
Shelter?”

“Yes,” Laurie answered. “I finally convinced the authorities, given the 
situation, that they had a huge responsibility with Wendy and that I wouldn’t 
hesitate to go to the newspapers if they didn’t give her a place right away.”

 “Good. Thanks, Laurie.”

 “Nick”, she added before he left, “I’d like to talk to you soon. When could it 
be?”

I don’t know. Call me.”

Laurie was preoccupied by the fact that the 1500 hours were almost done and that 
LSP would loose Nick. And she was already missing him. But she also was 
convinced that these kids were good for Nick, they were maybe his only link to 
his own emotions, especially since Lulu was gone. She was wondering how she 
could persuade him to give some hours, from time to time, to children in her 
care. It didn’t have to be through LSP, though, just pro bono work. She knew 
there was no lost love between Alvin and Nick. The situation was even worse 
since Lulu left, with a little help from Alvin, Nick suspected.

How could she ask him Nick to do more? Back to her house that night, Laurie got 
an idea and decided to make a call. She liked the guy and she knew he would 
never ask for help, so she decided she would give him the opportunity of a 
second chance.

A month later. – The Incline

Everyone from LSP was there: Alvin, of course, James and some other lawyers Nick 
had spoken with a few times. Even Barbara was there. The party was the 
conclusion of the corporate lawyer’s 1500 hours of community service as a child 
advocate. Laurie and Burton were the only people not with LSP. Both of them were 
talking together, waiting for Nick to make his arrival. Burton was telling 
Laurie about the day he threw a party for Nick who never showed up. He was 
afraid it could be the case again. 

But, no, there he was, a bit put off by all these smiles and cheering for him. 
Nick felt uncomfortable because he was happy to be done with his community 
service. There was still another year of probation then he would be free. 

Despite his reluctance to attend parties with no booze, no coke – he found 
himself wondering “how do you enjoy yourself when you need them to open up? ” he 
decided to be a good sport that night and admitted to himself that he would miss 
some of them. Especially James and Laurie. Barbara could not not notice the void 
Lulu’s absence created. Lulu should have been the one to be there, but she 
didn’t ask Nick about her, knowing it was still a very painful subject for him. 

People seem to enjoy themselves, laughing, joking and teasing Nick the corporate 
lawyer who would now make big bucks with all this free time!

Just when Nick was thinking about her, Laurie touched his shoulder:

“Nick, could you please give me a ride back home after?”

“Sure. You want to leave now?”

“Whenever you’re ready.”

“Let’s go then. Thank you, guys. See you.”

Goodbyes were said quickly, in a Nick’s fashion. No fuss, no hug! 

In the car, Laurie started.

“So you’re happy it’s over?”

“Yeah.”

 “You are good with these kids, won’t you miss them?”

 “Why do you ask?” Nick suspected she was onto something.

“Well, I thought a lot about you and about your abilities with the kids.” 
Turning to him, Laurie added, “You are really good with them. You respect them, 
you try hard and you never talk down to them. On the other hand, I think these 
kids are good for you, too.”

 “What do you mean?” he asked cautiously.

 “I mean these kids helped you growing, Nick. I know it’s not my place to say 
so, but... I’ve been watching you with them. I saw how much you’ve changed, 
these last two years, and how well hidden is the real Nick behind his corporate 
suit!”

Nick blushed. He didn’t know what to say. Her praise made him truly happy, but, 
in the same time, he didn’t want to be read like that. He felt like a boy in 
front of his mother.

“You remind me of my mother,” he said, the words getting out of his mouth before 
he could stop them.

 “How is that?” she asked, interested. It was the first time ever Nick told her 
something really personal.

 “She used to say nice things about me. Until now,” he added, surprised by the 
truth of this, “she’s been the only person to do that.”

 “Really? There must have been other persons to appreciate you, Nick,” said 
Laurie. “I know one of them.”

 “Who?” he asked curiously.

 “What about Lulu?” 

“What about her?”

“She seemed to really appreciate you.”

“She never said so. That’s probably why she left,” added Nick. He was almost 
pouting. 

“Come on, Nick. You loved each other. How could you not see that when everybody 
else could?”

Nick was silent. He squirmed when Laurie started talking about Lulu. He had 
tried so much to convince her to stay in Pittsburgh! What did he do wrong? He 
had even told her he loved her and even that didn’t stop her from leaving. 
Worse, she told him, more or less, that she didn’t believe him, that he was only 
trying to keep her in Pittsburgh! Just thinking about it hurt so much! 

Nick stayed silent and Laurie didn’t try to engage the conversation anymore.

“ Here we are, Nick ”, Laurie said, when they arrived in front of her house. Do 
you want to come in for a moment? There is something I’d like to talk about with 
you.”

Intrigued, Nick stopped the engine and accompanied Laurie to her door. The 
lights were on. Laurie unlocked the door and they both came in. Nick was a 
little nervous, feeling he might be getting “set up”. 

“Hi!”

Nick turned his head and saw Lulu sitting on the couch. Obviously, she was 
waiting for them.

“Laurie, it’s… You shouldn’t…” Nick stuttered. Then turning to Lulu, he said : 

“What are you doing here?” he said rather dryly.

“Stop this childish behaviour, Nick,” interrupted Laurie. “It is time for you 
two to talk. I asked Lulu to come here and she wanted me to warn you before, but 
I didn’t. So, now I’m going to bed and you talk.”

She closed the door and went upstairs to her room.

Lulu and Nick stared at each other. An uneasy Nick sat down next to her, close 
enough to reach out and touch her, but far enough to pull back if she were to 
reach out first. Lulu’s nerves got the better of her as she struggled to find 
her words. 

“How was your party, Nick?”

“OK.”

“How is everyone?”

“OK, I guess…”

Both were uncomfortable. They didn’t know what to say, they had kept too much to 
themselves, for too long. Now that they were there, together, neither one of 
them could say a word. Lulu, feeling she owed him some sort of explanation after 
leaving the way she did, took the first step.. 

“Nick”, Lulu began. 

“Hum…?”

“I’ve missed you…”

Nick looked at her, still angry, but he couldn’t stop looking at her. God, she 
was so beautiful! He remembered with a pang these lips he kissed, the lips that 
kissed him. What went wrong? Before he knew it, his hand was on her cheek, his 
fingers tracing her mouth, his eyes in hers that were filling at the moment.

“Lulu”, he said, “why did you leave?” his fingers still tracing her lips.

“I thought it was the best thing to do at that time. Nobody needed me here and 
somebody over there was interested in me. I guess I was wrong!” she answered 
sadly. “I’m sorry if I hurt you”


“You knew I needed you,” Nick said, softly.

“I wasn’t sure...”

“But I told you I loved you”, said Nick, raising his voice.

“I guess I have a hard time to believe such a thing.”

“What else could I have said to keep you here? What should I have done?” asked 
Nick, standing up, feeling his old frustrations coming back. “You’re the one who 
didn’t put anything in this relationship,” he added, looking at her with this 
hurt look that always broke her heart.

“Don’t be angry,” she answered, a little disoriented by this emotional Nick She 
paused a moment. “There is some truth to what you say,” she admitted, “I’ m just 
beginning to see it.”

“Are you back for good?”

“Hem…well, I don’t know…”

“Do you like it over there?” thinking, over there, away from me.

“The truth is… I miss every thing here,” she paused. “No. That isn’t it… I miss 
you Nick and I… You…" She stopped, trying to find the right words. 

Nick watched her as he waited with baited breath for her confession.

“Nick, I need you. I don’t know if you can forgive me, I don’t know if you can 
find in your heart enough love for me to start over. But I want to be with you.” 


She had admitted to herself the simple truth : she loved him, plain and simple, 
there was no denying her feelings now. But she was afraid it was too late. As 
she was about to say something else, Nick approached her, taking her hand in 
his.

“Come here”, he commanded softly “You know I’m crazy about you…” he paused a 
moment, as a small smile crept across his face, “I even accepted to wear a 
foolish apron just to please you. That should tell you something, don’t you 
think?”

Brushing his fingers over hers, slowly, he raised her head, caressing her face 
with his eyes. Their lips met. The embrace was like…coming home. 

“Remember when I told you I loved you?” Nick asked, still holding her face close 
to his. Lulu nodded. “You didn’t know what to say. Say nothing if you want, but 
please, believe me, Lulu. I love you… truly, more than what I thought I was able 
to.”

He was surprised how easy it was, finally, to tell her about his love. Lulu held 
him tighter for a while, her head in the nest of his neck. Lulu whispered in his 
ear :“I love you too, Nick. I should have told you so.” With a passion born from 
a long wait, they kissed, Nick’s hand in her back pressing her against him, 
Lulu’s hands around his neck, wanting more.
Then, she took his hand, leading him toward her guestroom.

“Don’t you think we should go somewhere else,” Nick asked cautiously, a little 
ill at ease, with Laurie upstairs.

“Laurie said you could stay here, if I needed to.” She smiled, looking at him. 
She put her hand on his face, looked in his eyes and added “…and I need you to, 
Nick.”

Their lovemaking was perfect. Slowly, they rediscovered each other. Sometimes 
they would stop, afraid the noise they were making would be heard by Laurie. The 
thought of it made them laugh! They felt like two teenagers hiding from their 
parents! But then increasingly, they got lost and forgot about everything and 
everyone.

"I feel so good with her, " Nick thought to himself after Lulu fell asleep. For 
the first time in months, Nick slept through the night. 

The morning after, Lulu woke up, hearing Laurie in her kitchen. She looked at 
Nick, still asleep, and couldn’t believe how complete she felt in his arms. Nick 
was holding her tightly, even in his sleep; and his _expression was peaceful, 
content. 

Slowly, she emerged from the bed and put her bathrobe on. 

“Hey. Where are you going?” Nick asked, now awake.

“I was going to see Laurie,” Lulu leaned over the bed and kissed him. “Good 
morning, Nick.”

“Don’t go now. Stay here," he said, patting the bed, beside him. 

Lulu slid back under the sheets. She coiled up against him. He kissed her 
without a word. For a while, they stayed like this, afraid that if they moved, 
it would stop what felt like a dream. She looked in his magnificent aqua/blue 
eyes, seeing nothing but love. Nick might be a secret man, but his eyes were 
unable to hide the truth. If I could learn to read them better! she thought. 

“What are your plans, today?” Lulu asked.

“I have some papers to work on,” Nick answered, looking not really enthusiastic 
about the prospect. 

“Will we have some time to talk?” 

“About what?”

“Us. My job.”

Nick stayed silent. Lulu watched him as his face was closing. Nick the mute was 
coming back. But this time, she avoided the confrontation and decided to wait a 
bit before going back to the point.

“Ok. Let’s have breakfast,” she suggested. “I don’t want to give Laurie’s 
imagination too much work!!!” she added with a playful smile.

Reassured upon hearing her, Nick got up and put his pants and shirt on. They 
kissed again, unable to stop touching each other.

Following Lulu in the kitchen, Nick smiled to Laurie.

“Good morning,” said Laurie, sitting at the table with her coffee and the 
morning newspaper. “Did you two sleep well?” she asked, smiling. She couldn’t 
help it, she was very pleased with herself. These two belonged together, even if 
they had to work on it. 

“Yeah. Thank you,” they both said, in the same time. 

“Well, sit down. Now, I want to talk to you, Nick.” 

Nick raised his eyes, already wanting to be out of the house as soon as 
possible. 

“I told you how good you are with kids. I want you to use your skills and keep 
being useful.”

“My community service is over, Laurie. I don’t owe anything to anyone.”

“Maybe you owe it to yourself. And you just don’t know it.”

“Why should I?”

“For one thing, I know you didn’t let go of all your cases,” Laurie said, 
looking at Nick. 

Nick looked puzzled. He didn’t tell anyone that he was determined to stay some 
kids’ guardian or lawyer. When he met Judge Damsen who had to decide who would 
take over his cases, he had surprised her when he announced that he intended to 
still be Jesse’s guardian and Wendy’s lawyer. He didn’t know exactly why he was 
doing that, but he felt he had to, that, in fact, he owed them. Wendy, because 
he was the one to put her through another nightmare and Jesse, because... Jesse 
was his guilt. He’s been shot to protect him and the other kids in the room and 
he should have prevented this accident. 

“Nick, I didn’t know that!?!” exclaimed Lulu, pleasantly stunned. 

“So, you are still involved, Nick and I think it’s the best for you. But you 
could do more.”

“I don’t have to”

"No, you don’t and that’s why you should do it,” Laurie declared, on a decisive 
tone.

Nick looked nonplussed. Lulu was amazed by everything she was learning. "Teflon 
man cares enough to stay these kids’ guardian?" finally realizing that she had 
been wrong about him, all along. 

“Nick, I know it would make Alvin mad, but I would like you to take care of 
certain cases,” Laurie said. “It wouldn’t be too much time, I promise. But it 
would give you some purpose and it would give me the pleasure to see you and 
argue with you from times to times,” she added, smiling.

“OK I’ll think about it,” Nick finally conceded.

 “Good. Now, take your coffee and go enjoy your day. I’m going to see my 
grandchildren so I’ll be gone all day. Lulu,” she added, “take the key with you 
and make yourself at home. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

When Laurie left, both Nick and Lulu looked at each other and burst out 
laughing. 

“Wow!” Lulu exclaimed, “that was something, wasn’t it?”

“That’s Laurie.” 

Nick knew he has been tricked. But all in all, maybe that was for the best. Pro 
bono work always looked good on a resume, he thought. Then, he had to admit, he 
kind of like the challenge. The win was never clear, but the heart had to be. 
His father wouldn’t be very happy with his decision. But, for now, he didn’t 
have to tell him. 

He turned to Lulu thinking that if he could make decisions about the future, he 
wanted to know what her role was going to be. 

“Now, what are you going to do?”

“I don’t know. I guess I have to make up my mind myself, ” Lulu replied, knowing 
he was not only talking about the day. You know I’d prefer if these decisions 
were up to fate, but I think I can’t wait for that to happen.”

 “Lulu”, he said slowly, “I’m here. I work here, I want to live here…and I want 
you to stay here …with me,” Nick continued, looking at her intently.

“Nick…,”Lulu hesitated. She had asked Nick to speak up and there it was her who 
couldn’t say a word.

“Anyway, I have to go.” 

Nick stood up, washed his cup and put it back in the cabinet. “I’m going to my 
office and you can call me, …anytime,” he added, afraid he was sounding too 
harsh, but at the same time, a bit impatient with Lulu’s hesitations. Now he had 
laid his cards out on the table, he wanted her to do the same. 

He went the room to finish dressing. Sitting at the table, Lulu was trying to 
think fast, but was too nervous to find the words.

Nick kissed her gently, then said, his voice cracking :

“l’ve been waiting for you, and I can wait a little longer, but don’t take too 
long. ” 

He left the house, Lulu watching him from the window, unhappy with herself, yet 
unable to make a move. But she knew one thing for sure : she had to make up her 
mind soon, if she didn’t want to loose Nick a second time .
 
To Be Continued in "Following the Bliss"